I Wish I'd Said....

So many thoughts going through my head. I once was told years ago that I have a chatter box in my head that NEVER shuts up. Even at night when I sleep (well try to sleep) my thoughts keep going. Like a bad food that you eat right before bed, that upsets your stomach, something that I read or heard before bed, keeps me up with racing thoughts.

Yesterday was a FULL day of reading blogs and comments from the blogs I follow. I know a lot of the blogs I follow write to have some type of ACCOUNTABILITY to their dieting. So I looked up the word and this is what I found: a form of trustworthiness; the trait of being answerable to someone for something or being responsible for one's conduct. Wow; I also want to add what it means to me. I see it as another word for being HONEST with yourself and others. (like not being a liar).

I have a BIG issue with people when they lie. So for that reason I choose NOT to lie or even associate with those who do. So the reason I blog is NOT for ACCOUNTABILITY reasons, that SO many people do. I am NOT calling those who use their blogs for accountability LIARS. Just want to explain why I blog.

When I read and comment on blogs I internalize their information and use it as SUPPORT. I then TRY to respond with a helpful comment. As I am sure so many of you do too. A supporter once said to me "that you blog for yourself, not for other people and who cares how many followers you have, and if they post a comment or not. Your blog is for you." Well I stewed about this for awhile. IT IS ABOUT the followers and comments to ME! See I don't need the accountability that others need. I understand the need that my friends have to receive that accountability though. And I hope I NEVER say anything that would be taken as a non supporter or a weight loss SABOTEUR.

What we say to the ones we care about, love for, or even support needs to be said in a very sensitive way. No one wants to be hurtful on purpose but there are people out there (such as me) who carry what others say close to their heart. Everyone has their own reasons why they blog and they all have their own style.

I take things to the extreme as my husband has told me so many times over the years. It's either ALL or NOTHING with me. I need to get that under control but not quite sure how yet. I am still a "WORK IN PROGRESS". I need the validation I suppose and not quite sure why. Maybe it stems from my childhood of being FAT and feeling like I wasn't important or good enough. I am sure Dr. Phil would have a hay day with me. LOL

I am so thankful for the followers I have and their comments that offer me support and validation. If the readers only knew that their words are a support for me. Maybe they would see that they are also helping others, not just themselves. I think I will continue to write on the behalf of my readers and maybe I will get something out of it for me in the process. So you guys and gals go right head and follow me and comment away.