Sunday, May 16, 2010

It's Never Enough....

When I started this journey 7 months ago I was just wanting to get below 200 and lose 50 pounds. Then, after 6 weeks, the 1st one happened. I was shocked it happen so fast. Then I wanted to get past the 190's. I thought that day would never get here. Then 9 weeks later I broke to the 180's. My only thought was now I want to get to the 170's. This one went really fast only 4 weeks. (not sure why but it probably had to do with the increase in my exercise routine.) But no matter what the reason I was still wanting more. You guessed it, I wanted to get to the 160's.

6 weeks went by and I thought I would NEVER get to the 160's. Finally I made it but was that enough? NOPE!!! I want to see the 150's SO BAD my teeth hurt! (not really but you get the frustration). This is week 6 of the 160's. And for the other mile stone , I am 2.2 from losing that 50 pounds.
I am going to be so excited to get to the 150's or am I?
My poor hubby has to hear my "nightly step on the scale read out." And the constant "UGH! I am still at that stupid same number" comments. I don't think I will be happy with the end results. Even with all the people telling me that I look good at the size I am, I still don't see it. I hope once I reach my WW goal, I will have learned to accept the size I have become. And NOT want more.

Some may call them mini goals but I get little satisfaction after I reach them, cause there is always another one that I want.
It's Never Enough.....


  1. NEVER, NEVER, NEVER enough! LOL...I ccould hear you pounding the keyboard while writing that and the grrrrrrr in your voice. Heck, I understand soooo much of what you are saying and feeling. What it all comes down to is not the size, but how you feel. If you feel great and comfortable at 160, then great, but IT IS NEVER ENOUGH. Keep going Lesia, and tell hubby I hear the same thing here at home with Kathy. I feel his pain!

  2. That pesky ego makes its demands.
    And it's never enough, eh?
    Sometimes I "wish" my only goal is just to "be"....
    Like a song from "Rent"
    Hope you are having a good weekend!

  3. I'm afraid of this too.
    I think you'll know when you feel comfortable in your own skin.
    I also think it's best not to focus too much on the numbers. Look at yourself in the mirror and see if you like how you FEEL physically.
    And is how you're eating something that you'll be able to maintain over a lifetime to keep yourself at your maintenance weight.
    If you get down to a *magic* number ... say 140 ... but you have to starve yourself to stay there ... well I would say that that isn't a good weight. Maybe you could try 150 for a while and see how you feel and how comfortable you are.
    I'm rambling. Sorry. :D

  4. ohh lesia you poor thing! I can't even imagine what you must be going thru! It has to get better, aren't you at the bottom of things? hehe only to better is up??? Maybe!! *hugs* Hang in there girlfriend!

  5. oooh - totally true!! I agree 100%! Listening to our bodies is hard to do. I don't feel like we (women) ever feel like we are enough - in everything we do...

    Yeah...i'm LDS. I don't have a specific diet plan that I am following. I need to get going on something. I use the bodybugg to track all my food and stuff. I was successful with Body for Life a few years ago, too. My dr. recommended South Beach so I may see how that goes for a while. I struggled with WW. Counting and recipes and all that. For some reason it just never sank in with me. I did online though - maybe different if I went to the meetings...? I dunno.

    I'm so glad I'm not the only one with a poo I wish I was Miss Regular going every morning right after waking up. Maybe in my next

  6. Leisa .. thanks for your kind words... I just realized people have been leaving comments on my blog.. sorry I had a setting off

  7. Your progress has been amazing! Take it where you need to go to see what it's like.

  8. Good for you! I think you are doing great! I am so proud of you Lesia! You have always been an inspiration to me with all you strive to do better than you already do! You are an awesome friend and I would not trade your support or example for anything in the world!

  9. Hey! In response to your comment, my name is Kaitlyn and I live in the northeast (although not by choice, haha, can't wait to be somewhere warmer!). I've used Medifast as a tool and I'm about to transition back to eating healthy grains, fruits, and dairy in a few weeks! How is WW working? I considered the program, but ultimately decided on medifast, for no particular reason (my doctor's office advocates it). Anyhow, in response to this post..don't let the number on the scale control you! Sometimes I get caught up in that too. I weigh daily (sometimes even twice!), but I've come to realize that no one else can see that number. I try to focus on how I look and feel. I do have a goal number to reach, but if I feel like I reach a "healthy" weight before that, I'll stay there. I guess after all this rambling, I just wanted to say "be proud of where you are and don't stress about the scale!" haha :)